European scientists have recently published their discovery of 32 new planets. Journalists at Miskatonic Press Agency have reported that Brussels has forced these scientists to suppress evidence that one of the planets was capable of sustaining life.
Asked why the European central government would attempt to suppress this amazing news the scientist responded, “That’s going to come out soon”.
In a speech at the Cook Convention center Louis Farrakhan urged the black community to seek internal reform. Farrakhan followed the speech with an assertion that he had proof that the government was directly responsible for the H1N1 virus, stating that he had spoken with scientists who had said, “[with] 6.5 billion people. We just can’t feed that many. So what are you going to do? Kill as many as you can”.
A recent article from the Australian quotes Holger Bech Nielsen of the Niels Bohr Institute in Copenhagen as saying that nature abhors the Higgs Boson particle that the LHC was designed to manufacture. According to Nielsen, the LHC has created a Higgs Boson particle at some future point, but this rupture has had ripple affects in time causing the recent catastrophes that have prevented the LHC from operating.
Recent work stoppages at the LHC have included a fire and the arrest of one of its scientists for ties to Al-Qaeda.
From the Rocky Mountain Collegian, Prof. David Horn recently spoke at a conference telling attendees that since the early history of man reptilian aliens have been guiding man’s evolution in hopes of someday using them as slaves.
As reported previously, scientists recently found a ribbon of magnetism enveloping our solar system. The field runs perpendicular to the galactic heliosphere and most likely plays a role in blocking cosmic rays.
Dave McComas of the Southwest Research Institute has recently been quoted as saying, “It wasn’t there before, that’s what people need to understand. We have data from a month earlier. Something turned this thing on, and there’s no telling if it is going to stay on”.
In the spring of 2008, the Catlin Arctic survey members began collecting data on arctic sea ice. Initial findings showed the sea ice to be much thinner than originally thought and at one point the team had to leave camp in the middle of the night in order not to be sucked in to cracks forming in the ice bed.
“There was a lot of loud popping, then the ground started shaking,” said one team member. Running from the camp in the dark they couldn’t see their way back to camp. “It was frightening,” the scientist added, “like there was something under the ice out there to get you”.
According to expedition leader Pen Hadow, modern science is missing direct observation. “It’s dangerous work, and chilling to hear the ice growling when you are trying to sleep, but it’s necessary work”.
Scientists now believe that the Arctic sea ice will be gone in ten to twenty years as a result of the survey. “They’ll be more shipping lanes,” Hadow said, “but they ought to know what they are getting into before they come up here”. Adding, “Things can stay frozen up here for a long, long time. Who knows what’s under the ice”.
